I hope Santa’s big bag had some accountability

I hate going on those “Back in my day” rants, so instead I hope Santa delivered gifts to some adults as he filled the tree with presents for the kids. I hope he gave them the gift of parenting.

I’m not talking about parenting by using rope to create a leash to keep kids within a five-foot radius when outside the safety of the home. I’m talking about giving them the gift of taking accountability and passing it down to their kids.

If a child gets a poor grade in school, take accountability that they didn’t work hard enough, don’t go after the teacher as if they’ve failed you and your child. I’m not sure when this schism occurred, but when I was in school, my grade was my responsibility. If I got a low mark, I was grounded. My parents didn’t march into a school office and demand a sit down as if they were settling a Mafia war. They didn’t threaten to sue the school district for academic neglect, heck that term didn’t even exist! I was given a couple extra hours of study time a night and my parents were always available for assistance.

Granted, you didn’t have to pry a phone or a game controlled out of my clenched grip, but that really shouldn’t matter.

I was once punched in the mouth in third grade, and now that I think about it, I was lucky not to have been stabbed or shot, but you know what happened? The doorbell rang later that day and the kid who delivered the right cross stood there with red eyes and his dad next to him and apologized. The dad didn’t accuse me of instigating something and my dad didn’t accuse his son of bullying.

Hands were shook and that was that.

Part of me thinks that parents project their own insecurities onto their kids. When I look back on it, parents didn’t have time in my day to do that. The Bernatavitzs had eight kids to look after. The Sheehans had seven. The Maloneys had nine! They might have been lucky to do a head count at 8 p.m. Forget about trying to stalk down any injustices that happened on a random Tuesday.

I don’t think parenting should be a synonym of smothering. If your child is playing in the yard and is out of eyesight for 10 seconds, it isn’t mandatory to call the police and gather the populace to do a search party. The bogeyman most likely lurks on the Internet, not in the side yard bushes, as difficult as that might be to believe.

Santa – I beg you. Just give some common sense to those who influence youngsters. Build character, independence and responsibility instead of developing strong hands for finger pointing. Because kids of today eventually will have to learn to do things on their own, and one of those tasks may be parenting!

This story was originally published December 23, 2016 at 3:43 PM with the headline "I hope Santa’s big bag had some accountability."